Archive for the ‘Dad's Jokes’ Category

- ask him.

If he says, “Yes,” you know he is a crook.
Groucho Marx

http://www.feedmejokes.com

If you can fake that, you’ve got it made.
Groucho Marx

How he got into my pajamas I’ll never know.
Groucho Marx

but in your case I’ll be glad to make an exception.
Groucho Marx

- I kept the receipt.
Groucho Marx

is so when you die, they’ll say, ‘Well, she looks good doesn’t she.’

before my brain figures out what I’m doing…

is so that I could hear heavy breathing again.

This enables you at 85 years old to spend an additional 5 months in a nursing home at $7000 per month.

I do have flabby thighs, but fortunately my stomach covers them.